We all start out life with focus on ourselves and then grow outwards. For example as infants we have to learn how to operate our bodies, how to walk and talk, sit and feed ourselves. As we grow older we learn to interact with our family members and then progress to friends and groups we are part of. And then we start to reach out past those boundaries and start to think in terms of all types of life, all mankind, the planet and so forth.

People who suffer from low self esteem miss out on the joy they could be having in their relationships, their chosen careers and the simple joy there is in living.

Now, there is one cause of low self esteem (and it probably does not apply to you) and that is criminality. Criminals have, as a common trait, low self esteem and as a result they have no respect for others or their property . They are constantly harming other people. Could anyone feel good about themselves while constantly harming other people?
I don’t think so! They harm themselves as well as others with their anti-social behavior.

But what about the person that isn’t a criminal, the person that just simply feels he isn’t worthy?

Why in the world would he suffer from a lack of confidence and self respect?

That is the Million Dollar Question.

It could be that it stems from being abused or suppressed. It could be that it is a result of committing acts one is actually very sorry he did. It can even be that the person doesn’t have any reason he can see that would cause him to feel such lack of self respect or self esteem. Whatever the case, in order to solve this situation a person has to start doing something about it. You have to take action.

The choices are many. Be smart and be logical. The actions you take have to bring you to a point where you can manage things and no longer be the victim.

Here are definitely things not to do:

A. Take drugs (prescription or otherwise) or alcohol to solve the problem.
B. Institutionalize oneself in a Psychiatric Institution.
C. Pretend the situation doesn’t exist and just live with it.

No one realizes really how you feel. How many times have you heard something similar to this?

“Hey you’re (smart, pretty, have a good personality…fill in your own description) why don’t you just go for it?”

They just don’t realize that YOU don’t feel confident or sure of yourself; which is what the problem is. It doesn’t ever really matter what others think, it is how you feel about yourself.

Most people just don’t understand.

You know you are smart, you know you are just as good as the others around you. But, what you don’t know is why you feel like you aren’t as good. You don’t know why you have such self doubt, such low self esteem. It is illogical. It is frustrating and can drive you crazy. But it is REAL!

Building confidence starts at a very basic simple place:

1. You are a person with unlimited potential.

We have to believe this because so many people (even those we know are inadequate) are huge successes.

So what makes them different from a person that has talent and ability and isn’t successful?

The successful person has enough drive to carry through his own doubt and inhibitions and he pushes himself through them. He doesn’t allow his worries and his fear get the best of him. He doesn’t allow that little voice in his head slow him down, he ignores it.

If you have low self esteem or you lack confidence or self respect, it just isn’t as easy for you to push through the barriers. But you can learn to do so.

The effects are devastating and have long lasting effects. The fact that most people have this problem to a greater or lesser degree doesn’t really help you much when you are kicking yourself for having lost one more opportunity because you couldn’t face up to it.

How do you get a handle on this? Understanding what the situation is and having a workable technology that works in building ones confidence is the key.

One action you can take to start is to set goals that you can get done. And then getting them done. You must use a principle developed by L. Ron Hubbard called “Gradients”. This means starting small and then gradiently (little at a time) making those goals larger. This is very workable as you can at any place along the  way observe when you have taken too large a step and correct it. So the mantra is “a little bit, then a little bit more, then a little bit more”. Before long you are doing things beyond your wildest dreams.

Now part of this is learning how to accomplish the tasks you set for yourself. So you may need to improve your communication skills or learn to feel more comfortable around people. Mr. Hubbard designed actual courses you can study to learn exactly how to do this. They of course apply the gradient principle and so are done one step at a time at your own speed!

You may want to learn how to play a Chopin piece on the piano. Where do you start? Start with beginner lessons on the piano. Learn the basics and then progress from there. Do not try to play the Chopin piece right out of the gate!

Many feel empty and have a lack of self esteem.

There are also those whose lack of self esteem causes them to fail at achieving their goals and leaves them suffering and depressed. Too many of these good people then end up on heavy anti-depressants and anti-anxiety drugs.

With low self esteem, regardless of material success, you suffer.

There are numerous contributive factors that can leave one feeling inadequate and empty. These factors can be identified and can be improved without the need of heavy, addictive, life destroying drugs. How confident can one be if the only way he feels good is when he is taking drugs?

I suggest looking at the following possibilities:

A . Is there someone that negates every good thing you do?

B. Is there someone that is constantly giving you advice “for your own good” that is contrary to your  personal goals?

C. Is there someone making you feel small or squashed or unworthy?

D.  Is there someone you just can’t please no matter what you do?  

Do any of those sound familiar?

They aren’t the only reasons one can have low self esteem but they are a good starting point.

If you are working hard to do well and you have people around you that are fighting your success covertly or overtly, you are going to have a hard time.

Don’t let this happen to you. Learn how to manage this situation with skill and tact.

Nothing can be more rewarding than loving and raising a child. As a parent, you get to share with them valuable lessons in life so that they become a productive, happy and active person in a world full of promise and opportunity.

But on the other hand, nothing can be more frustrating and aggravating than not knowing what to do when it comes to raising a child or a teenager in a world that is just as full of wrong decisions and pitfalls as it does pose opportunity.

Admittedly, being a parent is not always easy. But not having correct and practical "real life" solutions makes a stressful situation almost impossible. Scientology writings contain answers on what causes teenage rebellion and how to handle it. And better yet, how to prevent it when you are raising a young child before they hit their teenage years.

We have several short and inexpensive Life Improvement™ Courses that teach one the basics of achieving better communication and control, as well as being an effective parent, so that one has a loving and sane relationship with one’s children. Here are some selected quotes from L. Ron Hubbard on the subject of children:

"A good, stable adult with love and tolerance in his heart is about the best therapy a child can have."

"You want to raise your child in such a way that you don’t have to control him, so that he will be in full possession of himself at all times. Upon that depends his good behavior, his health, his sanity."

"It is a remarkable fact, a scientific fact, that the healthiest children come from the happiest mothers."

~ DIANETICS: The Modern Science Of Mental Health

And I don’t mean simply looks.

Beauty and looks eventually fade and a relationship based solely on “looks and sex” will, without a doubt, hit a very rocky road.

You want to examine mutual interests, similar goals or mutual purposes. Look at what you
admire about your partner. Look these things over and work together to strengthen them.

A word on a person’s faults or weaknesses

As is known we are all not perfect and we all have areas in which we can improve. When you enter a
relationship you will see those weaknesses in your partner and they will be magnified
because of the intimacy of your relationship. To make your relationship work you have got to
be willing to live with those faults and to support your partner regardless of them.

If you really cannot stand something about your partner and it truly grinds on you to the point
that you go crazy, you have got to get that addressed early on. If you don’t and just let
it go, something is going to eventually go BANG!

The key here is of course communication and DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT !

There is a give and take…a sharing…a flow to a successful marriage or relationship which is not always easy. It takes patience, work and it takes skill.

We don’t always seek help when we need it . Or we think we can simply “ride it out”. While those solutions may have been the accepted norm at one time, they simply don’t work today.

The basic area I recommend one work on is the skill of Communication. It is the underlying ability one needs to be successful in any area of life.

It opens the door to being able to do something about any situation.

Welcome to the world of Stress!

Under stress we seem to have too much on our minds. Our thoughts wander as we are pulled from one thing to another mentally. We don’t know what to do and we get overwhelmed.

Do you see a common denominator? It’s been discovered that stress seems to be most prevalent when a person doesn’t think he or she is capable of handling or dealing with the problems at hand. There is also the aspect that time plays in all of this. The less time one has to to accomplish a task the more pressure there is and so there is more stress.

There is also one other factor that is extremely important and commonly never observed.

It is this:

A person can be brought into a condition where he believes he is not capable and so doesn’t believe he can do anything. It is insidious.

This can happen in numerous ways but the fact remains that this degrading of the individuals ability will always have one particular person at it’s source. There is a person usually a “friend” making life miserable for the stressed out individual.

People don’t go crazy, they are driven crazy!

If you are stressed out in life and it isn’t a temporary situation or emergency but it is an ongoing thing week after week or month after month or worse yet year after year, you had better start looking around at who you are associated with.

Someone ( and they are usually a little tough to spot) is making your life a living hell.

Now before you go on a witch hunt and disown everyone you know and love, make sure it isn’t one of the things I mentioned earlier such as the lack of training or education in an area or the time factor or the emergency factor.

If you have ruled those things out, then I suggest looking into L Ron Hubbard’s technology for handling these so called “friends”. There is a correct and an incorrect way to sniff them out. And just as it is very important that we find that person and get them handled, it is just as important that we don’t mistakenly single out someone that is in fact a very good friend.

Life is tough enough when we are surrounded by people that have our best interests at heart and when we are helping our friends live good productive lives.

A good education (and that doesn’t mean you have to have degrees from universities, you can learn on your own) good management skills and an ability to sniff out the pretender are your key elements to survival and a stress free life!

If one thinks that detox only applies to those with drug and/or alcohol problems, then we really need to redefine the broader applications and needs of a program for the person who is simply looking to improve their overall spiritual wellness.

The only program that fits into that broad scale usage is the Purification Rundown, the most effective program of its type taking a more holistic approach.

Those factors which have contributed to global warming have also created adverse affects on our health and wellness as a whole person, spiritually and mentally.  Toxins in our environment reduce our longevity, health potential, awareness, the ability to think clearly, reaction time and thus our own happiness.

Toxins come from all sources and this factor adds stress to our body and mind. No one today is immune from toxic exposure of one form or another.

It is evident that we live and work in a chemical-oriented society. Virtually everyone is subjected daily to the intake of food preservatives, pesticides, atmospheric poisons and the like. Add to this the wide assortment of medical and street drugs consumed in our society and the magnitude of this global problem becomes obvious.

The Purification Rundown is a carefully designed combination of exercise, vitamins, nutrition and sauna use which dislodges drug residues and other toxins from the fatty tissues so that these substances can then be eliminated from the body.

While the Purification Rundown rids one of the biochemical residues that reactivate past drug experiences, it is but the first step to a full resolution to the spiritual harm caused by drug, medicine and alcohol abuse.

The Purification Rundown is a tightly supervised regimen of exercise, sauna, nutrition and a properly ordered schedule which includes sufficient rest. All of this together results in the elimination of drug residues and other toxins from the body’s fatty tissues. Before starting, one must receive doctor approval.

The Purification Rundown is a major breakthrough by L. Ron Hubbard that has enabled hundreds of thousands to be freed from the harmful effects of drugs and toxins.

In 1977, Mr. Hubbard’s research revealed that LSD stays in the system for years after a person has taken it, lodging in the fatty tissues of the body. Months or even years later, a person can go on a “trip” as LSD residue move out of the fat.

Subsequent research revealed that not only LSD but a long list of other street drugs, as well as chemical poisons, toxic substances and medical drugs, can all become lodged in the body’s fatty tissues of the body and cause a person to re-experience their effects. This phenomenon has since been confirmed in numerous independent medical studies.

To find out how you could start on your road to a better and happier life, call us at 1.800.488.4577 or request your free kit now:

The factors that comprise the essence of “happy” really derive from a true belief in self and having in alignment all the important factors of our life.

Buzz words like “balance” and “wellness” have been offered with many suggestions from newsstand magazines on how to attain them, but what it really takes to understand the holistic dynamic of self-respect is to analyze the component parts of what makes us happy.

A study and survey was conducted on what people found to be the vital aspects of self-respect, and it was very revealing as to the true essence of what is necessary for us to consider ourselves worthy and our lives relevant and important.

And all of these factors can be found and addressed with the basic know-how of mind power and life as contained in Dianetics and Scientology.

The key factors that comprise self-respect are:

• Virtue
• Love & Help of Family
• Academic Competence
• Physical Health
• Support from Friends

Dianetics is a modern science of mind.  Scientology is a religion which means “Knowing how to know.” Both subjects provide workable know-how and spiritual enlightenment to each one of these five factors above.  By having a basic understanding of the materials as contained within Dianetics and Scientology, each factor above can be improved coupled with the intention to “heal” self, starting with our own soul.

Let’s examine in summary how the know-how of Dianetics and Scientology could improve each above factor.

Virtue really is a personal sense of right and wrong. It is taking the initiative to do the right thing, as well as take responsibility for rectifying anything in which we feel we have harmed or helping anyone we have wronged. This know-how is contained in L. Ron Hubbard’s book, The Way To Happiness.

The Love & Help of Family can sometimes be a difficult area in one’s life, especially when it comes to living up to certain expectations or having felt one has failed another.  Because people can be so close, very often situations that would seem relatively simple to resolve with non-family members, take on levels of complication too hard to face or deal with. In Scientology, one can learn how to deal with the dynamics of existence and how to maintain good communication and understanding with those within your own family. Maintaining your own integrity, while maintaining good relations is a key to self-respect.

Academic Competence can have many rewards and personal satisfaction, but it can also present many serious and stressful ramifications and penalties if one does not meet certain expectations from family or from the work-a-day world. It has been found in some studies that stress from school can be some of the most severe in one’s life. Good pay or bad, the respect of others and one’s own sense of worth can be at stake. L. Ron Hubbard developed Study Technology, as well as counseling on the subject of study, to remove the barriers to learning so one can rise to new heights of ability in life.

Physical Health or the lack of it can be the difference between a great outlook on life or one filled with anger, grief or even a sense of defeatism.  Many times, self-sabotaging habits manifest themselves as bad personal habits that result in overweight or just feeling ugly to your own self.

While Dianetics and Scientology do not address the body, nor heal the body, there is the subject of psychosomatics.  Your “reactive mind”, which is fully detailed in The New York Times bestselling book, Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health, stores repressed memories that can result in psychosomatic illness and bad habits. Learn how to get rid of your reactive mind with Dianetics!

Support from Friends is a necessary component of life and self-respect. But the burning question is: Who really are your friends?  In Scientology, we know that a small percentage of people are “anti-social personalities.”  These people can not only destroy your life, business or even marriage, but they can even pretend with great, blood-curdling skill to appear as your “friend.”  Their prime target to reduce is your self-respect and personal confidence.

In the book, Scientology: A New Slant On Life, you not only learn the twelve distinctive characteristics of the social and the anti-social personalities, but you learn effective techniques to move up in life and then surround yourself with people that will support your goals and endeavors to be a happier, more successful person.

Increase your self-respect by reading and applying one or all of the books mentioned above. As well, discover the life-changing benefits of Life Repair.

First and foremost, communication is the tool that must be used. And in our “pop a pill”, “try to forget” society, we often overlook the fact that you sometimes have to work at something to make it better.

In a troubled marriage you can’t wish it away. You have to work at it. Whatever you do to get the ball rolling you need to get the dialogue started. Maybe a night out, a walk around the block, maybe just a cup of coffee at the dinner table. How you start isn’t important, it is that you start.

You must also use manners. It is too easy to point the finger and blame your spouse, particularly if things are rough to begin with. But without using manners and being courteous things will definitely get out of hand fast.

Communication is at the heart of the matter for couples dealing with troubles. In fact it has been said that lack of communication itself is what creates the problems to begin with.

Imagine this: What if you could talk to your spouse about anything in the world good, bad and ugly! What if your spouse would simply listen to you, would acknowledge you and allow you to speak your mind- never uttering a mean or derogatory comment and never looking bored or upset.

How would you feel? I’ll bet you’d feel pretty darn good.

Well now imagine you doing the same for your spouse. How would they feel? Would they like you more? Would they be willing to listen to you more often? Would they stand up for you?

Use communication. Don’t shy away from it; it is a tool not an issue!

Couples can love one another and yet find their marriage in trouble.

Don’t drift apart, get together, talk about it. The only mistake you can make is to stop communicating before it is resolved.